Tragedy Strikes The Set Of Dance Dance Revolution With Wolves

B Miggs on April 17th, 2008

In a daring attempt to recapture what little was left of his downward spiraling career ever since he drank his own piss in Waterworld, formerly relevant actor Kevin Costner has secretly begun working on an exciting new hybrid project. Referred to as a wacky spinoff to his Academy Award winning 1990 film Dances With Wolves, his latest outting is sure to take the world by storm. Jobless Costner was recently approached by the Japanese video game company Konami to walk the company pets for some extra bucks here and there. Konami president Yakookoozazoozski San Mellincamps witnessed Costner develop close bonds with the animals and thus, the genre-bending Civil War themed rhythm game was born. Sadly, the out of shape actor and his trusty wolf companion weren’t quite ready for their “Footloose On Fort Sedgwick” musical duet and a medical emergency amassed. Read on for the first devastating set picture…

Doctors say it could be months before Lietenant J Dunbar and co-star Da Wolf Cubbin’z walk again and years before anyone gives a shit about Kevin Costner to begin with. The movie will be in theatres Friday and on DVD Saturday morning. Stay tuned!